As I got ready this past weekend to judge a chili/gumbo cook-off, two things occurred to me: Man, my life is fun, and foreigners sure complain a lot considering how easy we have it in China.

My foreign friends and I whine, bitch, moan and complain all the time about the daily grind we suffer in China. So much so one might wonder that if life was this hard for us, why don't we go home to our respective countries? The answer is simple: life is better for us here than back home because we get special treatment.

This is nothing new to many Chinese that work with or know some foreigners. We generally get paid more - - much more - - for doing the same jobs as Chinese. We are not subject to the same punishments or long hours as many of our Chinese colleagues are and we get more perks for our efforts. There are reasons, however, why the system is set up this way. If Chinese companies want to attract foreign experts they have to offer competitive salaries with companies back home. Often, they need to pay a lot more than a similar company in the west because the stigma of poor living conditions is still attached to China. But the fact of the matter is that many of us take lower salaries than we got at home because the cost of living difference puts us ahead and we know it's a pretty sweet gig. Of course, in general, the quality of the working environment in China is not as high as it is in developed western countries, but a little extra cash goes a long way to make up for a dirty squat toilet in the office. The extra money won't stop many of us from profusely complaining about it to other foreigners though.

Socially, the vast majority of foreign guys have never had it so good. How many times have you seen hot Chinese women hanging off the arms of old or ugly dudes? I guarantee 9 out of 10 foreign guys living in China will tell you that their social life is much better than it was at home. I have a buddy, who will remain nameless, that has been with dozens of beautiful young ladies in his two and a half years in China. He claims he was not a player back home and he was always a one-girl kind of guy. I believe him. The reason he was a one-girl guy back home was that dozens of hot, young, nubile women were not lining up and even competing to go out with him. Now, if you were him, would you rush off home? All the attention won't stop him from finding something to complain about though. His complaints are common ones too, and echoed by many single foreign men: the women is his life either want too much commitment or are just plain crazy.

 Even some laws don't apply to foreigners. My buddy Dan used to ride one of those BMW knockoffs with the sidecar. One day, I asked him if it was hard to get his motorcycle license. He just laughed. He pointed to his grinning face and said confidently, "Buddy, this is my license." He has never worn a helmet, stopped for red lights, or pedestrians. He speeds, cuts off other drivers and drives on the forbidden ring roads in Beijing with impunity. He told me a cop once tried to pull him over but he just pretended he didn't understand and kept on driving. The cop didn't bother to chase him. Try that on the streets of Boston Dan and see what kind of treatment you get. I am not condemning him, though. He's just playing by the unwritten rules that are in place for foreigners. There is definitely a double standard.

 China is not necessarily the land of milk and honey for all foreigners, and we still have quite a few problems to deal with, especially culturally. We get ripped off by cab drivers all the time. We pay 7 dollars for t-shirts that many Chinese would only pay 5 dollars for. Our sensitive stomachs have a hard time processing the bucket loads of half-cooked chuan we consume after the bar. It's damn near impossible to find a decent steak here.

So I am off to judge the chili/gumbo cook-off. Next week it could be a singing contest, acting contest, debating contest, beauty pageant, fashion show, speaking role in a movie or commercial, voice work job or groin model gig. Who knows what the future will hold. But I'm sure I will be able to find something to complain about.